Psalm 139:14 “ I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well”.
When we take great care in the names we call our spouse the response is positive. By giving an endearment we create a moment of pleasure simply through the use of a word to label an attribute or image we have of our spouse. It may be corny or even embarrassing if use in mixed company, but should be held special as a secret language between the two of you. A way to put meaning and thought to the special person you married however long ago.
With maturity some endearments may need to change as life changes. Others will last the test of time, always an emphasis to the special commitment you have made to each other. Just as with changes in life there are many changes in setting and timing that we all need to be careful of as well. It is not a good time to use a pet name for your husband with a group of his friends or peers. What creates a warm feeling between the two of you now is destroyed by the jabs he will receive from those around. Husbands should be sensitive to this as well. A cute pet name together can be belittling or embarrassing when mentioned in mixed company. Remember that this is a language and a code for just the two of you.
When my wife and I were still in the engagement part of our relationship her grandmother brought up an important point about names. When we get in arguments it is critical we stay with the issue and not call each other negative names. By calling each other names we cause hurt that could become more of an issue than what we disagreed on in the first place. By keeping name calling out of an argument we could quickly get to the bottom of the issue and resolve the problem. No threats of sleeping on the couch or going to bed mad.
Endearments are part of your language in telling your spouse you love them. Sometimes always saying I love you can become superficial and worked where a simple nick name like “beautiful” can say the same thing. My wife and I would play with words many times trying to come up with synonyms that would imply the same thing. Start with a word like wonderful each taking a turn to come up with different ways to empress the same thing until you get stuck. Then choose a different word and do the same thing. Remember at the same time these are words that you would use to describe your spouse. Find words to use instead of your spouse’s proper name to describe what they mean to you. Use this word in a note or letter to each other. Refer to them with it in bed or a time where it is just the two of you. This is the importance of an endearment.
It is saying “I Love You So Much”.
